Sometimes you just have to drop what you’re doing and write. Or draw. Or take narcissistic self-portraits. The first two are even possible at work if you have enough isolation around your working area. The last one is also possible at work if you’re a genuine unashamed narcissist oblivious to the personhood of others around you. But that one’s not me.
What is it like for people who work in creative fields? How often do you just want to throw whatever tools you’re using to create something with words or images on the floor and switch to another art form – or even something blandly numerical?
As my basic profile to the right of this post says:
“I work with numbers by day, so to compensate I play with words by night. And photos. And drawings. And sometimes puppies, when I break into other people’s houses.”
But I sometimes can’t wait until night. I need to take a break. Being anti-social, averse to mundane conversation, and having a different lifestyle than the predominant workplace culture that surrounds me, those breaks aren’t spent chatting in the lunch room. They’re spent writing, or drawing, or reading, or crying about my paralysis in any of those things as if writer’s block really mattered in my life. It’s bad enough I have to repress so many of my sexual urges. My creative urges are more fundamental to me as a person. If I can’t put them to use the Doomsday Clock of my own personal sanity clicks a minute forward. I’ll give myself credit and say it moves from 11:45 to 11:46. Others may disagree and say it’s 10 minutes slow, but I think I’m a little bit more reliably stable than the thought of Iran developing nuclear weapons. But I digress; the advance of military technology and the domineering of other nations’ politics by the United States is a subject far from my own personal bouts of inspiration.
…or is it???