The Cowardly Career Path

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I take back what I wrote yesterday about regret over taking a desk job rather than the risks and freedoms of self-employment. That’s what gets people into the mentality of time is money (and by extension of social mathematics, wasted time is wasted money and time spent is money spent; however, and alas, free time IS NOT free money). This turns people into their own harsh and demanding Dickensian employers, and makes buzzwords and expensive webinars about those buzzwords relevant to their work. That would be terrible.

I am a fan of many artists who operate on the business model of “giving shit for free first, asking for money for that same shit later” which is something I respect. I read web comics daily and generally buy books or prints or other merchandise when available, because of my love of paper and the idealistic principles of fans paying it forward that these artists depend on. Some of these artists are entrepreneurial and diversify their products and services. Others complain of problems making their rent…and delivering products already paid for. (I won’t get into that consumer complaint.) Some people can balance their creative self-employment with good business practices. Others can’t, but still stick to their practice because they can’t or just won’t work a steady job.

I don’t have the enthusiasm, determination, or tolerance for bullshit buzzwords that successful self-employed people need. I certainly don’t have the confidence in my work nor the sales skills to pretend that I do. I also don’t have the dramatic eccentricity to live in squalor and die of diseases of poverty, as that takes a lot of effort and mental illness and/or pretending to pull off in this era. I guess I just find it too easy to work like a “normal person” day in and day out. I guess I’m just not that committed to escaping my status quo white privilege comfortable middle class upbringing in either direction.

And I would hate having to talk about my work even more if it wasn’t a boring job nobody cared about beyond half a sentence. What’s more painful for me to bear than talking about a boring life is being asked about an interesting one. It wouldn’t be anyone else’s business what I did if I were self-employed. It would literally be only mine.

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